so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Ketchup is God's man juice
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Randomize
