it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
