Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
