Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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