he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
