how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
