You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize