I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I think your dad took our porno
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Randomize