Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
