you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
