I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
