I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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