I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize