nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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