We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize