Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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