i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
