The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
