You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
