Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize