He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
