I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize