Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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