ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
