You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
