Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
