I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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