Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
