After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
do nipples grow back?
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