If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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