my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize