listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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