She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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