just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
