my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
