So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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