I could have mohawked her pubes.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize