Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
