Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize