Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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