I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
me + whiskey = a bad person
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
