Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I licked your asshole in confidence.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
