I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
