I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
