Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
