If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
