dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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