There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
