Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
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