I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
