I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
There was a lot of him and a little penis
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
